A collect call

– A mighty good mornin’ to you, prime-minister!
РHello. My name is Jos̩. Who are you?
– It’s Dubya, your friendly ruler of the free world!
– Oh… nice talk to you, Mr. President.
– Well, ‘round here we got ourselves into one hell of a mess, and I was expecting you Europeans could bail us out…
– Yes. E-mail out. I have computer. Portuguese computer. With mail.
– No. The Federal Reserve is so dry I’m spitting cotton. We’d be mighty grateful if you could spare us some change…
– Change? Oh, yes: my government has many change, and future, and progress. Thank you.
– Listen: sure you understand English?
– Of course I understand. Me master in Technical English! But no need change.
– You ain’t being very polite, ya know? After all we did for you guys, when you had those commies there…
– Come here? You want come here? Porreiro, pá! You visit me, me in all the newspapers!
– Oh, momma. Maybe I’ll have more luck with the Albanian guy.


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